I’m white. I fit in. People don’t really notice me. I don’t get the German stare. I move through life pretty smoothly here. No one cares, until I open my mouth.

The accent gives me away instantly. Then comes the question: Where are you from?

I say I’m Latina. That’s when the confusion starts.

Why are you white?? You don’t look like THEM.

I think they skipped a few history classes. It’s fine. I smile and explain.

Honestly, living in Germany has been easy for me. I’m quiet, introverted, good with rules. I was raised Catholic, I’m educated, I speak well, I’m conventionally pretty…and most importantly, I’m white.

When I mess up in German, it’s “cute.” She’s trying.

Racist men don’t hate me. They flirt with me.

They want a “traditional” Latina woman who’s compliant and family-oriented—and surprise, she’s white too. Dream scenario.

They talk about how MY people shouldn’t reproduce, but somehow my babies with them would be fine? Make it make sense.

I clean apartments as a side job. People tell me someone like me shouldn’t be doing that.

Someone like me how? If not me, then who should be cleaning?

They complain to me about immigrants being evil criminals. I remind them I’m an immigrant too.

“No, not you. You’re different. You’re one of the good ones!!”

But my family isn’t white. I can’t stop wondering what they’d say about them if they were here and it breaks my heart. I think I made a mistake by moving in here.